Today I found out that my friend Russ passed away. I take this opportunity to honor him and the gift he left us.
I met Russ through my dear friend Shirley who married him some years ago. When I was going to meet him for the first time I felt very protective of Shirley because I wanted her to be treated with the love and respect that I felt she deserved. So I was ready to hammer this guy if he wasn’t up to the job.
To my pleasant surprise Russ was what we ladies would call, “a gem”. He was genuine with a great sense of humor and an incredible smile. As strong and as tenacious as he could be was only balanced by his sweetness and kindness to others. What I loved about Russ was his straightforward attitude that seemed to come less from the California coast and more from the NY east coast mentality of “telling it like it is”. I resonated with him in that way and often felt we intuitively connected on detecting that type of behavior.
His personality, in that regard, is what embellished his way of life. Russ thoroughly created his life. He jumped in head and heart first diving into the waters of his passion equally excited to bring them to the surface for us all to witness and share with him.
He did not hesitate.
He was a practical dreamer who didn’t wait for the genie to appear but crafted his dreams from the opportunities life presented to him.
Russ was a wealthy man in the game of life.
Russ died as a result of a mysterious motorcycle accident of which the outcome in my mind is still to be determined. I say that because Russ in his adventurous spirit was never careless and always a responsible person in everything. Just like his personality he was determined yet aware and I don’t believe that he would ever take unnecessary risks. To that end I am deeply saddened.
However, the risks that Russ did take, that we can all learn from, were to follow your passion and live life to its fullest at all times. This is a message we all need to hear and have drummed into our heads on a daily basis. Anyone who knows Russ understands that he left this planet with no regrets; he loved his family, friends, work, nature, hobbies, and himself; something we can all aspire to in our own lives.
For his 50th birthday in October his wife, Shirley, treated Russ by giving him the gift to swim with the dolphins and experience being a dolphin trainer for day. He found delight in challenging himself to new adventures and these brilliant, mystical creatures added a new dimension to his every day existence. I can’t help but think that Russ is riding a dolphin at top speeds somewhere in the great unknown smiling like a Cheshire cat spreading his joy for eternity.
That’s how I’d like to imagine it anyway.
Let us learn from Russ to create a passionate and abundant life in all ways.
Thanks for the lesson Russ…
We’ll miss you.
Russ Downie
1958 - 2008
Posts
2 comments:
Hi.
I'm not sure who you are. A friend of Shirley, it says. I was very surprised to find this picture and those wonderful words about my brother Russell. Jeezus, I miss him. I was nodding my head as I read the part about him being responsible and not careless. He wasn't. For me, his accident will always be a mystery as well. How, I ask myself, how? I am quite intimate with the answer that sometimes (often) there is no answer.
Russ was the rock that held me and my sisters together. Though we hold ourselves together now,with phone calls (as we live in varying parts of the world), I miss not being able to pick up the phone and call him when I need to hear his voice, his sage advice, or even his, "Awww, c'mon Linda. Quit being so sensitive". (and I am).
Thank you for your kind words. You have a great impression of my brother and thank you for sharing it with others. He was a very good (not perfect) model for the young men of today.
Sincerely, Linda Downie
Thank you for your response to the post I put up a long time ago.
Yes, I am a good friend of Shirley and knew your brother very well. I knew Shirley before Russ and around the time they were dating. I remember meeting him for the first time and feeling very good about him for my dear friend Shirley. Then Russ became a dear friend of mine and then my husband too. We used to go out to dinner or a movie occasionaly and Jeff, my husband, and Russ really hit it off well. They had a lot in common and we so enjoyed our time together.
I wrote the comment about the accident because Jeff and Russ discussed riding motorcycles and we both knew how conscientious Russ was about his riding. One of the reasons we both felt good about him on a motorcycle even though both of us had issues with "other" people around people on bikes. My husband was in a pretty bad motorcycle accident many years before I even met him so he had decided not to ride any more. We were mostly concerned with other people and not Russ. That's why I really had some strong intuitive feelings that something wasn't right about the accident. I don't really want to bring up the past becasue there is nothing any of us can do now but I did mention my feelings to Shirley. I still think that all of it seemed very odd and that there was not enough investigation into the accident from the police aspect from my point of view. But I know it was so difficult for Shirley at the time to have to go through thinking about all of that and of course it would not bring Russ back anyway. I just have a thing about justice but sometimes compassion out ranks justice.
Anyway, that post I wrote I was supposed to deliver at Russ's funeral service. Shirley asked me if I would read it and I was very honored to have the opportunity to share my feelings, especially for both of them. However, I got really sick and couldn't go to the funeral and so I think Shirley read it instead or maybe not. I can't remember now.
I have often said to Shirley that the toughest part about losing someone is not when it happens but years later when everyone has forgotten and you are left with the pain that is still healing. That is why it's important to have friends that can continue to help support you and your healing process. I know that you are all still healing from Russ's to early departure from this world and my blog was one way of keeping his memory alive. So glad you found it, especially more than a year later. I'm glad I could in some small way contribute to your healing process.
He was truly a wonderful man, friend, husband, father and I'm sure, brother. He was a great role model for any man. Jeff and I miss him too.
Thanks again for your oomments,
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